*(November 22 to December 21)*
Happy birthday, Sagittarius. “This too shall pass” always seems like a platitude when you are going through it, but it’s one of the truest statements there is and also applies to the beautiful times as well. Whether you are feeling good right now or suffering, know that you cannot cling to the feeling, nor can it cling to you, no matter how attached it might seem.
*(December 22 to January 19)*
There is a lot of talk about trusting one’s intuition, but how do we know what is intuition as opposed to an impulsive thought or a crappy defense mechanism? I mean, people have done a lot of crazy shit in the name of God, talking dogs, or voices in their heads. In my experience, an intuition may possess some of the same adrenaline as an impulse, but it’s a lot quieter. If your head is a noisy place, chances are that what you are hearing or feeling is not your intuition.
*(January 20 to February 18)*
Intellectually, you have a tendency to question a lot when it comes to the outside world. But in terms of your emotions, the feelings and deep-seated beliefs that guide your actions, you have a tendency to forget that these are not fixed states or firm rules. If you are doing something that is boring you or feels in some way like it doesn’t fit, ask yourself why you are doing it and whose reason that is.
*(February 19 to March 20)*
Thunder only happens when it’s raining, players only love you when they’re playing, and some people — no matter how much they seem to have changed — will always create the same dynamic between the two of you. This isn’t entirely their fault or your fault, but the nature of a dynamic that has been cut like a groove on a record and it’s just where the needle will always fall. You can’t re-record the record once it’s cut. So, maybe time to play a different one.
*(March 21 to April 19)*
Often, the thing that we despise most about people is really the thing that we cannot tolerate in ourselves. As they say, “You spot it, you got it.” I don’t think this means that you have to love every shitty thing about yourself, or love it in others, but having an awareness of why certain things hit you hard can be helpful when you feel baffled by the behavior of the world.
*(April 20 to May 20)*
What we resist persists, but sometimes our resistance is not in the form of a direct protestation. Rather, our resistance can arrive in the form of an unwillingness to look clearly at some aspect of our lives. This month, pay particular attention to those things you approach with a vague or nebulous nature, and ask yourself why.
*(May 21 to June 20)*
The origin of the word sin does not mean to be a total shithead or a ne’er-do-well or unfit for this earth, but simply to miss the mark. This month, when you are not who you would like to be or are embarrassed of your behavior, perhaps you can reframe it as simply missing the mark. Without a load of self-torture, it might be easier to see the target more clearly and avoid missing it next time.
*(June 21 to July 22)*
There are moments when you see a little boy eating chicken by himself and you feel like you are going to cry … or when an old man is buying plums and your heart breaks … or when a cashier smiles at you and you feel like you are no longer alone in the world. Those moments are not just hormones. They are your humanity, our common essence coming through, and they are more real than anything else that can possibly go on.
*(July 23 to August 22)*
You have the tendency to make everything into an emergency — in part because you really do love being alive, and being in a state of emergency lifts you out of the doldrums of life and changes your feelings into excitement and adrenaline. This is totally fine. It’s your life. But for the sake of experimentation, what if this month you allow nothing to be an emergency, no matter what, and see what that’s like.
*(August 23 to September 22)*
Stillness is scarier than motion, but only because when you are still it’s harder to distract yourself from difficult truths. But we as human beings can learn to sit with anything, and even you — a runner by nature — can find some spaciousness in stillness. You may ask, “But why would I bother doing this if I could just as easily run instead?” Well, someday everything will grow very, very still, and it’s a good idea to be acquainted with it in advance.
*(September 23 to October 22)*
The action of surrendering something that isn’t working for us is a lot harder than it sounds. What does it mean to let go, and how do we even start the process of doing that if we don’t feel willing? One way is to ask the universe, or whatever you believe in — your therapist, sleep — to help you become willing to be willing. Another way to start, even if you can’t move away yet, is by not taking any more steps closer to that thing.
*(October 23 to November 21)*
If you stay outside and fight the elements all winter, you’re going to tire yourself out and freeze. But if you sit indoors by a fire, it’s actually kind of peaceful to watch the wind, snow, and desolation outside. There is a contrast between what is warm and what is dying. Consider, also, that you always have a fireplace inside you — even when life seems cold and barren.
*Melissa Broder is the author of four collections of poems, including* Last Sext *(Tin House 2016), as well as* So Sad Today, *a book of essays from Grand Central.*